My suede shoes are balding from the toe. I've tried brushing the nap forward to make a sort of suede comb-over but it doesn't fool anyone.
I suppose the only consolation is that my shoes now match my head: my body is now bookended by baldness.
The local cobbler gave me a funny look when I asked about suede transplants, so perhaps I should shave all the suede off my shoes so they're completely nap-less; sleek and smart like regular leather shoes?
Then I could be walking around with two Yul Brynners on my feet; flashing a pair of shiny Kojaks as I saunter down the street: "Who loves ya, Blucher?"
Alas, I find myself wearing a couple of misshapen Friar Tucks, complete with ill-kempt tonsure and grubby cassock.
